Christmas Eve Eve: A Mayer Family Tradition

Christmas Eve Eve, in the Mayer household, is when the Christmas celebration truly kicks off. And it doesn't really end until my Dad's birthday, on the 28th. We like to milk this oppurtunity to be fat and lazy as much as possible.

So on Christmas Eve Eve, the "kids" -- myself, my sister, and Jon Mayer, exchange gifts among ourselves. It's a little taste of all that Christmas spirit to come. We also open Aunt Frances' gifts, which without fail always arrive in the mail all the way from Lawrence, Kansas either the day before Christmas Eve Eve or on the day itself.

Lunch:
Mom made me a tuna fish sandwich and a baked potato. Yum.

The afternoon was fat and lazy, as expected during the Christmas season. I played video games after lunch. We heard a doorbell some time later, prompting my mother to go to the door. Aunt Frances' presents were here! Aunt Frances gifts are always a lot of fun. You never know what you're gonna get. Sometimes it makes no sense whatsoever. Sometimes she tries to throw a self-fulfilling prophecy on you. And, best of all, sometimes the gift is just what you wanted.

Later in the day, BFD gave me a call asking me to join him, Anna Mathew and Stacey at the diner. A Food Blog party! I hesitated at first, not wishing to disrupt the evening traditions of Christmas Eve Eve, but I decided to go with the intention of only staying for a little bit. As soon as I started the car, there was an "empty gas" light on the dashboard. I guess my Dad has been trying to squeeze out every ounce of energy, but it was a little disconcering for me. Luckily, I made it to the diner without my car stopping in the middle of any busy road or intersection.

Diner:
I had french fries only, knowing that my family was planning on ordering Colonel Taso a little bit later.

Dinner:
I got back just in time. Colonel Taso was on top of his game tonight. The chicken was delicious, as well as the chicken fried rice. Yummmm.

I forgot to mention that my Dad plays tennis with some buddies every Tuesday, around dinner-time. So he wasn't there for Colonel Taso. Apparently, he went drinking with aforementioned buddies after tennis! So the hours passed without sight of Dad. We watched "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" at 8 on television. Then "Babes in Toyland," starring Keanu Reeves afterwards. It was close to 10 before Dad finally came through the garage door.

With an unusually late start to the Christmas Eve Eve celebration, we all promptly sat ourselves under the tree, placing our gifts to each other and the Aunt Frances gifts in their appropriate spots. The joy of Aunt Frances gifts came first. I got a pair of leather gloves, which was nice. One of the less bizarre gifts I've recieved from her over the years. My sister got the wierd gift this year: a romace novel from the 60's signed by the author! WTF?! My mom always gets jewely that Aunt Frances would probably wear.

Onto the kids' gifts! I got a wallet that looks like an NES controller from my sister, and some Wii points from Jon Mayer. Good stuff. I got my sister a fancy shirt with some guitars on it, and my brother a book containing every imaginable fact about all the Presidents, including every inauguration speech.

But oh, what?! A secret gift from the closet? Apparently my parents decided to give Jon and me one final gift that they got last-minute. Yea, what the hell. Christmas Eve Eve doesn't really make any sense to begin with. We opened it simultaneously, revealing the Phillies Championship themed Monopoly set! How cool!

We played it very soon thereafter, and I got my ass kicked. The only unowned property I landed on the entire game was Jamie Moyer, our 46-year old starting pitcher. As the game approached midnight, Mom, Jon Mayer, and my sister began yelling at my Dad for getting home so late. We weren't even close to finishing the game yet! It truly was an airing of grievances. On Festivus, we had a true Festivus moment.

Merry Christmas, Happy Chanukuah, Happy Kwanza, and most importantly, Merry Dolemas!