I'm back and I now have super powers

Hello Blogger team. I had no idea I was gone this long but i'm back now.
it was a gorgeous night, moon was high over head the sky was so clear that you could see every constellation in the heavens
I was walking the pugs up at the school when I saw this light in the sky, right near the old Don Pablos restaurant .
next thing i know, I am home in the living room, and I have very greasy hair, I stink to high heavens and everyone is really pissed off at me, including the dogs. And now Im sure you all are my bloging friends.
They all want to know where I have been and what i have been doing and I have no idea what they are talking about. I walked the dogs, what the hell do they mean? Ian didn't even notice I was gone.
I have no recollection how I got home or when. They say I've been gone for days! The dogs were found roaming around up near Terrace Road that same night.
Me? I have no idea where I have been or what I've been doing all these days. I just know that I am very dirty and hungry and I am suddenly very aware of much medical terminology. I even seem to think that I can perform surgeries for some odd reason.
so, naturally i had a Bagel and cream cheese because it was bagel Friday at work.
So I went into the 10 am meeting and I sat down for the conference call to the pharmaceutical company and I described the side effects for the latest drugs on the market and began reciting the clinical trials and effects on the rats and monkeys when I noticed that everyone ese in teh room was looking at me as if I had two head. well , maybe three.
I just looked back and said 'What/?' what's wrong?
Next thing you know, Im being physically removed form the office and tied to a stretcher! By men in white coats!
And that my friends is all I remember. You KNOW I would NEVER leave the blog hanging in this manner for days at a time, especially after the many public floggings I have encouraged..
I'm having broth right now as I type from my secured and padded room. They have allowed me supervised time with a computer so that I could full-fill my blog duties.
i feel this strange vibrating in my head though from the implant that I think the aliens put in. this way they can find me more easily they said.
I can also hear them chatting up above.
"What!" what are you looking at me like that for?" I want a lawyer! I need some wheat grass!